5 reasons why the Packers will beat the 49ers (and 1 reason why they might not)
I was fully confident that the Green Bay Packers were going to beat the 49ers 57-0 until I heard the reports out of San Francisco that 49ers coach Jim Tomsula let a fart rip during Thursday’s news conference.
Now the score might not be so lopsided. Tomsula’s flatulence could be the secret weapon that helps the 49ers make a game out of this one.
For instance,how will Aaron Rodgers handle it if Tomsula lets one fly during a key series in the fourth quarter,causing Randall Cobb (or whichever receiver is closest to the 49ers sideline) to immediately drop dead?
What if the noxious fumes waft their way onto the playing field? If Packers offensive linemen pass out from the stench,is that a false start penalty?
How will Rodgers himself handle the situation if Tomsula crop dusts the red zone? Rodgers has dealt with plenty of adversity in his career,but never something like this.
Or what if Mason Crosby is setting up for a game-winning field goal and Tomsula raises his leg and provides a nasty gust of wind that pushes the kick wide right?
Be worried,Packers fans. Be very worried…
On the other hand,the Packers should be well prepared to handle any and all stinky situations. The state cuisine in Wisconsin is bratwurst,cheese and beer,after all. I’m sure plenty of grossed out faces have been made at Packers team parties following dinner and an “Alright,who did that?” fart.
And I guarantee you every member of the Packers offensive line has let one go as a joke during practice or during a blowout Packers win. Bryan Bulaga,Josh Sitton,or whomever,probably thought they were being funny by clearing out the huddle early. Little did they know they were helping to prepare their teammates to face the Great Farting Tomsula in the Big Bell Bottom.
Injuries haven’t slowed down the Packers this season. Neither has a challenging first part of the schedule or playing two games in prime time. I can’t see a gassy head coach getting in the way,either.
Here are five reasons why the 49ers will be just another fart in the wind on the Packers march to the Super Bowl:
Perseverance
No matter what type of injuries you throw at the Packers,they keep chugging along. Yes,having a healthy Aaron Rodgers makes it much easier to overcome the injury bug,but it’s nice to see a team not only hold it together through injuries,but thrive and improve. That train should keep rolling later this afternoon.
Multi-faceted
It’s still too early to make bold declarations about any team,but doesn’t this Packers team seem more diverse than other years? Yes,there are hiccups,but it seems like the Packers aren’t relying so heavily on turnovers to be successful on defense and big plays to take over the game on offense. The D is capable of holding their own without taking the ball away and the offense has thrived despite the lack of deep pass plays downfield. In past matchups,the 49ers’ power running would seize control of the game and their physical secondary would frustrate the Packers’ offense. The Packers seem better equipped to handle both of those things today.
Bring on the blitz
Under new coordinator Eric Mangini,the 49ers blitz often. Rodgers’ mobility and his ability to read the defense pre-snap makes him deadly against blitzes. So,Mangini should just try and get pressure with four rushers,right? Well,so far this season,when the 49ers don’t blitz they’ve been picked apart. It could be a damned if you do,damned if you don’t kind of day for Mangini and the 49ers defense.
Right side woes
Pay attention to the right side of the 49ers offensive line. The Steelers and Cardinals had great success going after guard Jordan Devey and tackle Erik Pears. Look for Dom Capers to employ a similar strategy.
Time to win one
Because the Packers can’t lose to the 49ers again,right? Green Bay finally beat Seattle this season,now it’s time to get that smaller 49ers monkey off its back.
…but just in case the 49ers run of success continues over Green Bay,this could be why:
Kaepernick owns Capers
Much like Bears quarterback Jay Cutler can’t figure out Dom Capers’ defenses,Capers can’t seem to figure out what to do against 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick. Kaepernick has trashed the Packers defense multiple times and is no doubt looking at today’s matchup as an opportunity to get his season — and career — back on track against a familiar foe.
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