5 Reasons the Packers will beat the Bucs (and 1 reason why they might not)

I’ve been thinking real hard this week, and I can’t remember ever seeing the Green Bay Packers play well in Tampa Bay. I know they’ve only won once in Tampa, but I don’t remember that win and I don’t really remember any losses where the Packers came up short, but at least played well.

All I can ever really remember about the Bucs are their so-bad-they’re-awesome sherbet orange uniforms with the pirate holding a knife in his teeth on the helmet. Talk about a classic look and a killer logo. If the Bucs weren’t the Bucs and actually backed up their awesome uniforms with some victories, we’d probably be talking about Tampa Bay as America’s Team instead of the stupid Cowboys and their lame star on the helmet.

Too bad Tampa ditched those unis for whatever it is they throw on their bodies today. Combine their boring new uniforms with that stupid pirate ship at their stadium (and the annoying commercial where they turn that dumb fan’s living room and backyard in a Bucs’ shrine) and Tampa Bay deserves all the misery it’s had to endure in recent history.

As bad as the Bucs are today and have been in recent years, they’ve handled the Packers in their house. Here are five reasons why that won’t be the case again this afternoon:

Angry after a loss
Don’t get in Aaron Rodgers’ way after a loss. In three games following defeats this season, Rodgers has amassed 963 yards with 13 touchdowns, zero interceptions and a 138.9 passer rating. Be afraid, Tampa Bay. Be very afraid.

Invincible Eddie
It doesn’t sound like Eddie Lacy is very excited about the possibility of wearing goggles to protect his injured eye, but I think he needs to embrace the new look. What if the goggles give him special powers? What if they provide an extra burst to truck defenders even harder than he already does? What if they give him x-ray vision so he can oogle at the fine ladies of Florida in the stands when the offense is resting? What if the goggles allow him to shoot lasers out of his eyes? Eddie needs to accept the goggles for these possibilities alone.

Another weak secondary
Unlike Buffalo, the Bucs are mostly weak in the secondary, especially at safety where the once hard-hitting Dashon Goldson appears to have been neutered and Bradley McDougald is just a guy. Whenever the Packers have come up against a weak secondary, they’ve usually shredded it this season. I see no reason why that won’t happen again against the Bucs.

No McCoy
The strength of Tampa Bay might be its defensive line, but with stud Gerald McCoy out, that strength might not be much of a strength at all.

Playoff time
I like how Mike McCarthy has already put the Packers into playoff mode. He adopted a similar mindset in 2010, when the Packers had to win their final two games to get into the postseason, then rode that wave all the way to the Super Bowl. The circumstances are a bit different today, but the Packers still haven’t clinched anything. And if they win out, they’ll have no worse than the No. 2 seed and a home playoff game. Nothing wrong with naming “playoff captains” two weeks before the playoffs if it helps the team get into the proper mindset.

Surprisingly, the Bucs have managed to win games despite their boring new uniforms. If they continue their run of good fortune against the Packers in Florida, here’s how it might go down:

Big-time WRs
Bucs’ wide receivers Vincent Jackson and Mike Evans are the real deal. Remember what Julio Jones did to the Packers a couple of weeks ago? Either Jackson or Evans is more than capable of doing the same. Of course, the caveat is quarterback quality. Josh McCown is nowhere near as good as Matt Ryan, but he’s capable, especially if Evans and/or Jackson start going off.